Another Family Picture For Our Agency

This picture was taken about a year and a half ago. It is on Huntington Beach, Long Beach California. It is one of my favorites...

The Doll That Will Travel To Korea With Us

This is the baby doll that we are going to take to Korea with us to give to our daughter. We are sending her a doll in her care package but who knows if she will still have it when we meet her. I loved dolls as a child-still do, and hope that she will to. I have tried to find babies with asian features so that she has some relation to her birth culture.
I bought this doll online at http://www.sleepysoft.com/
Click on dolls for Asian Children and scroll down to Baby Bottoms Asian Girl. She really is adorable. I am not affiliated with the sleepysoft website, just a satisfied customer.

Number 6

I called AAC today. We are now at number 6 again. The family that was on hold in front of us has come off hold. Also a baby that they thought they had referred was not. She had more special needs than the family could accept so they decided to wait for another referral. That takes us from 5 back up to 6. Going backwards now, although this is partly my fault as well because I should not post that I am a number until I know that a family does accept a referral. I knew that this could happen, so am mostly ok with it. AAC does have another baby girl referral right now but she may have some special needs as well so I will wait until next week or maybe even the next to see if we have moved up. Come on February give us a bunch of girls, we need them SOON for morale...

Redo-With Loving Care

This is my 3 1/2 year old son with the gift bag for our girl!


Well I did this post kinda last week. I took the photos and published them. I did not write anything though because I could not get the cups in the bag and was not happy about it. My husband said to leave them behind because he felt that they were not "age appropriate" for a 5-6 month old. Me, being a mother did not want to not put them in, my little girl needs some type of brighly colored toy that will catch her attention when she opens it. She will most likely be like any other child and care less about the clothing that we are sending her. I also wanted to send a dress and there was NO way I was going to get anything else shoved in the bag. I have heard that a traveling family will take along your care package for you. I have also been told that it needs to be a gallon size zippy bag. I HOPE the family or person traveling with my bag will have mercy on me and accept my bag that is a little bigger that the gallon size zippy bag. Laying next to a gallon size bag it only appears to be about an inch bigger when closed but who knows what the rules are. Maybe if I pay the extra bag fee for airlines they will be willing to take it. Also once the original zippy bag was closed my husband said that I should be sleeping with the blanket so that the baby will recognize me when we meet. I told him that I had sprayed all soft contents of the bag with my perfume that I will be wearing when I meet her. He then said that he had recently listed to a program on NPR and that he knew that I needed to sleep with it. Thanks for the info after shoving like crazy to get everything in the bag. I also feel that the foster mother with most likely wash the clothing and blankets before using them so not sure what I will do as far as sleeping with the blanket...As you can see I added two more toys and two more outfits to these photos...and four pairs of socks. Although if we don't get to send the care package before the end of spring I will have to redo again with spring-summer outfits.

Tol-Child's First Birthday

Tol has two meanings in Korean. The most common meaning is a child's first birthday. It can also be used as a generic description for birthdays: Chut-tol (first birthday), Du-tol (second birthday), Seo-tol (third birthday), etc.

Traditional Tol Celebration
The traditional celebration had four major components:
1) Praying and giving thanks
Praying
Traditionally, Koreans would pray to Sanshin (a mountain god) and Samshin (a birth god, also called Samshin-halmuni "grandmother") on certain days following a child's birth (birth, 3-7 days after birth, and 100 days after birth). They believed that Samshin resided in the cloth surrounding a baby.

To prepare the praying table, the parents placed a bowl of steamed white rice, sea mustard soup (miyeok-guk), and a bowl of pure water on the table. Next to the table they placed samshin siru (layered red bean rice cake). This rice cake was not shared outside the family because they believed that sharing this particular item with people outside the family would bring bad luck to the child.

After the table was prepared, the child's mother or grandmother would pray with two hands together. Rubbing her palms together, she would ask for her child's longevity, wish luck to the mountain god, and and give thanks to the birth god. This was acomppanied by repeated bowing. Male family members were not allowed to join in thes ceremony. Only female family members were allowed to participate.

Seoulites perform this ceremony early in the morning on the child's birthday. Residents of some other areas do it the night before the birthday.

2) Making and wearing the birthday clothes
Tol-bok
The clothes worn for the tol (tol-bok) are colorful, dressy clothes. They differ depending on the child's sex. Both boys and girls wear a long tol-ddi (a belt that wraps around the body twice) for longevity and a tol-jumuni (pouch) for luck. Silk cloth is used to make the tol-jumuni, folded at the top with a colorful thread pull-string to open and close. For the child's longevity buttons are not used. (For more pictures of children's clothes, see the Traditional Clothes section.)

Boy's Clothes
-pink or striped jogori (jacket) with puple or gray paji (pants)
-striped durumagi (long jacket) and a blue vest printed with a gold or silver pattern or a striped magoja (jacket) and a jonbok (long blue vest) with a gold or silver pattern and a hongsadae (traditional belt) over it
-bokgun (black hat with a long tail)
-tarae-busun (traditional socks)
-yumnang (traditional round shaped pouch)

Girl's Clothes
-striped jogory (jacket)
-long, red chima (skirt)
-gold and silver printed jobawi (hat)
-tarae-busun (traditional socks)
-yumnang (traditional round shaped pouch)

3) Preparing the table and performing the Toljabee
Birthday Table
The parents prepare a special Tol table to celebrate the child's birthday. The main food includes ddeok (rice cakes) and fruits. Over 12 different kinds of ddeok are prepared, including paekseolgi (white steamed rice cakes), susu-kyongdan (rice cakes coated with rough red bean powder), chapsal-ddeok or chal-ddeok, mujigae-ddeok (rainbow colored steamed rice cake), songp'yeon (half moon shaped rice cakes), injulmi (coated glutinous rice cakes), and gyep'i-ddeok (puffed air rice cakes). Among these, paekseolgi and susu-kyongdan are always included. Fruits can vary according to the season of the birthday. Different colors of seasonal fruits can be prepared and displayed in a row. Also, a bowl of rice, sea mustard soup, and many other various foods can be displayed.

Along with food, other items are needed for holding the Toljabee event. Items such as large bundle of thread, a brush, a Korean calligraphy set, pencil, book, money (10,000 won bills), bow and arrow (needle, scissors, and ruler for girls) are arranged on the table to predict the child's future.

Table Setting
The birthday child will be placed at the table so that the other guests can face him or her. Parents often sit the child on the bolou (Korean traditional mattress) and several bangsuk (Korean cushions). Since the child is small, this allows for getting better pictures. For the background, a Korean traditional screen is used at the hotel or other banquet hall.

Toljabee Event
In this event, the birthday child goes around the table and picks up items that attract him or her. The child's future is predicted according to the what he or she grabs. After placing the child in front of the table, the child's father becomes the guide for the child to go around the table and grab whatever he or she wants. The first and second items the child grabs are considered the most important. Usually Korean parents place the items that they want the child to choose near to the edge of the table. The child's future is predicted according to the items:

-bow and arrow: the child will become a warrior
-needle and thread: the child will live long
-jujube: the child will have many descendants
-book, pencil, or related items: the child will become a successful scholar
-rice or rice cake: the child will become rich (some resources say choosing a rice cake means the child is not smart)
-ruler, needle, scissors: the child will be talented with his/her hands
-knife: the child will be a good cook

4) Sharing the food with guests and neighbors
Sharing
After the Toljabee, the parents share most of the Tol food with the guests and relatives. It is a Korean custom that when the guests and neighbors receive the food they say kind words and wish for the child's longevity and good fortune. They also give presents such as a gold ring, clothes, or toys.

Food Meanings
Each food type and other items on the table have specific meanings.
-paekseolgi (white steamed rice cakes) symbolize a pure and divine clean spirit and longevity.
-susu-kyongdan (rice cakes coated with rough red bean powder) are used to ward off evil spirits so that the child can grow without any disease. (Koreans believed that evil dislikes red color.) Koreans believed that if they prepared these two rice cakes for each birthday until 10 years old, the child would not fall down and would grow healthy.
-injulmi (sticky rice cakes) and chal-ddeok (sticky rice cakes) are prepared to wish the child to be tenacious and strong due to the stickiness of the rice cakes.
-songp'yeon (stuffed rice cakes shaped like a half-moon) Two different moon cakes are prepared. One is left empty and the other one filled. The empty moon cake means the child will grow with a big heart. The filled one means to grow to be wise.
-jujubes and fruit are for the child's descendants to multiply and prosper
-noodles and thread represent a long life

Presents
When Koreans are invited to the first birthday of a child, they often present a gold ring to the parents. Friends and colleagues collect money to buy a gold ring. However, the rings are not for the child to wear. Instead, the parents use them later to pay for child's education or other needs.

Korean Holidays

Early Korea used a lunar calendar, as did most agrarian societies. As the rest of the world encroached on Korea, it eventually went to the solar calendar. Yet much of the country still uses the lunar calendar to keep track of births and deaths and some traditional holidays. Many people celebrate their birthdays according to both calendars, and the first days of each calendar are national holidays.

Solar
New Year's-January 1st and 2nd
Independence Movement Day- March 1
Arbor Day- April 5
Children's Day- May 5
Memorial Day- June 6
Constitution Day- July 17
Liberation Day- August 15
Foundation Day- October 3
Christmas Day-December 25

Lunar
New Year's (Seol-nal)- 1st day of 1st month, plus the day before and after
Buddha's Birthday (Seokka Tanshin-il)- 8th day of 4th month
Harvest Moon Festival (Chuesok)- 14-16th days of 8th month

With Loving Care

One Of The Korean Government's Campaigns For Domestic Adoptions

Lee Seung-ki

Yoon Eun-hye

Joo Ji-hoon

Wonder Girls

Kim Hye-soo
The above pictures are famous people in South Korean posing with babies that need to be adopted, it is a campaign the government is running to promote adoption. They are trying to make adoption accepted so that more Koreans will adopt the children that are currently being adopted by international couples.
I have considered posting about this and other campaigns for some time now, I have mixed feelings about it though, so have hesitated. I read somewhere yesterday that South Korea wants to end all International adoptions by the year 2012. That is very soon. We are lucky that Korea was/is still an option for us. I feel bad for all the families that are going to miss out on the opportunity of adopting from South Korea. I also feel for all the babies that may not have the chance at being adopted into a good family that is waiting for them to shower with love and affection.
Although if the program goes forward with a positive outcome and the Korean babies that are placed for adoption do find loving, caring homes in their homeland Korea, then who am I to complain/judge about that. I honestly do hope for the Korean babies that this is a good step in the right direction.
Just yesterday I had a co-worker ask about adopting from South Korea and she said that she and her busband are just in the beginning phase of considering International adoption. She wanted to know about the Korea program and our agency. It was hard to tell her that it is a great program but that she may want to consider their options quickly, because they do change. I do not want anyone to feel rushed or forced into making the decision to adopt or from a particular country but I also don't want to advise someone of a great program and then a few years down the line have them be heartbroken because the option is closed.
I know that there is a percentage of the world population that does not understand adoption. I have heard or been asked the following questions:
How could you love a child that is not your own?
You can have your own children. Why would you want to adopt?
Why would you adopt a child of a different race?
Why would you adopt a child that is not a newborn?
You have two kids why do you want another one?
I cannot fully explain why we are adopting, some of the reasons are very personal and I think each person needs to search their soul before committing to adoption. It is a long, emotional journey.
I will say that I already consider the little girl that we are adopting our own. I think about her every day. I am sure she has been born already and I wonder what her foster family is like. I wonder what her personality traits are. Is she happy, does she have all her needs met? Choosing to love someone is just as easy as giving birth. If your heart is open to loving a child, you will. Having a child by birth or adoption is a choice and thankfully I will soon be lucky enough to have a children through both circumstances.

#5 This Week

We will be officially number 5 this week. AAC has a baby girl out for referral right now. Once a family accepts her we will move on down the list! I am not sure about the family that was on hold in front of us. I did not ask. I know that they were supposed to come off hold in February so we will see what happens with that next week when I call. Why oh why can't they have a big jump and have like 3 baby girl referrals at a time?
We also have our final home study visit this Wednesday. Cutting it pretty close, huh?

Tired Of Waiting

I just want to get on an airplane right now and GO GET MY BABY GIRL...Enough said.

Nothing The Past Week

I am okay with not moving up yet. We have our final visit with our social worker on January 21st and I want the home study to be done before we are number 1. As soon as the home study is done though I would be glad to move in leaps and bounds! Maybe a referral around Valentine's Day? That would be fun...Maybe a little longer than that though with being number 6/5...

Lets Get The Story Straight...No Movement For This Post

Ok so I called AAC on Monday-(01/05/09) for an update. They started to tell me about two baby girls that they were waiting on, I was going to get excited about moving again, but then questioned more when they just stated, Oh you have moved up by two...Oh great so that makes us number 5, 4 or 3? Nope not really. They hadn't updated the official list to include the two babies Morgan had previously told me about so in reality we did NOT move up...Geez don't get a persons hope up AND please keep the list up to date so we really know where we are on it. Is that toooo much to ask. I know I am venting and I still really like AAC, just gets frustrating waiting and waiting some more.

Finally Moving At A Quicker Pace

I called AAC today. I talked to Morgan. I have heard alot about him but have never acutally spoken to him. He was VERY nice. He confirmed that we are number 8. He also said they have a baby out for referral so we should be number seven this week, he also added that they have a family on hold until at least July 2009 so we will pass them making us number 6 and then there is also a family on hold until at least February 2009, depending on how many referrals they get between now and February we may or may not pass that family up which could take us down to number 5...Aghhh it seems like its getting so close now... When we get to number 5 and below we could get a referral at any time. Some times families do not take the first baby that is referred to them and then the baby gets referred to the next waiting families until a family accepts the referral.

Lucky Family

The family that was number 1 on the list with AAC got their baby referral just in time for Christmas. They have accepted the referral. That brings us down to number 8.

Santa Bring Us A Little Sister From South Korea

Christmas Dress-For Next Year

I can't wait to dress Jinju in this next Christmas. She will be adorable.

So You Have Heard The One About How Fast Cold Tar Runs Up A Hill In Winter...

We are number 9. The agency said they have been informed that they will be receiving information about a little girl this week. That would put us at number 8. Oh how I wish time would fly. Although at this rate we would possibly travel around april/may and at least the weather would be nice.

Getting Ideas For Baby And Foster Mom Care Package

This is the blanket and baby doll that I will be sending in our care package once we get a referral. I would like to find some stacking cups and an outfit or two to send once we have been matched and know approximate sizes.
I still need to think of a few things to send to her foster mother.

Some Baby Dolls For Our Baby

10 And Holding...

Well I called AAC today for an update. We are definately number 10. They do not have any little girls out for review right now but there is one family ahead of us that is on hold. Depending on when they go off hold, then we are unofficially number 9. I don't put much stock in holds because you never know why the family is on hold and when they will go off. Guess I will wait two or three weeks and call again.

Cute Bracelet

I ordered 3 of these bracelets from Sharon Fortune, she specializes in custom, hand made jewelry. The above is a sample picture from her ebay account. Her ebay id is Sharsh74 and her email address is fortuneandglory1@aol.com her business slogan is "Affordable Jewels For Your Princess"
They turned out so cute, I can't wait until we get to wear them. I got one for me and one for each daughter!

Hooray For Baby Clothes

Several times I have wished that I would have saved more of my daughter's toddler clothes...I save my favorites. In my mind I would think, oh I wish I had...or such and such was so cute. Well the other day we were getting things ready for a "yard" sale and in the work shed out back, I found a great big bag of all the clothes that I had been wishing I had...It was great. It will be fun to have pictures of both girls in the same outfits! I think it will help my daughter connect with her sister when she sees her in some of her very own outfits.

Fate Or Something Like It

I have always wanted one of these pin cushions...I have seen them a few times and never got one. Well, I got a catalog in the mail and was ordering from it and they just happened to have the pin cushion, so I decided to get one.The package arrived and I put the other things away in my closet as they were Christmas gifts. I opened the package for the pin cushion and was surprised to see that one of the little guys does not have a face...Look closely, the top one in the dark blue...I took this as a sign that my baby is waiting for me. I have seen her several times in dreams now but it is always from the back. It will be some time before I see her face but I am willing to wait.

The Daffodil Principle

This is a story I found recently in a magazine...I think it is worth reading. The magazine did not list an author, so I do not know who to give credit to for this story.

The Daffodil Principle

Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead. "I will come next Tuesday," I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.

Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there.

When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.

"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"

My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured here.

"But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. I'll drive. I'm used to this.

"Carolyn," I said sternly, "please turn around." "It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience.

After about 20 minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, "Daffodil Garden." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I followed Carolyn down a path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.

It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain peak and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patters, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowered in large groups so that it swirled and flowered like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.

"Who did this?" I asked Carolyn "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house.

On the patio we saw a poster, "Answers to the questions I know you are asking" was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."

For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop.

Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.

That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at a time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time.

When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things.

We can change the world...

"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"

My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start today," she said.

She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make a learning lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"

A Grandmother's Gift

This is the very first thing that was purchased for our little girl. I was on a trip to San Antonio with my mom, daugher and son. We stopped in a visitor's center, they had a gift shop and they only had ONE of these. I had to have it. I didn't have any money with me so my mom bought it. She said "Who is this for?" She knew who it was for though because this same day when we were eating lunch at a fantastic bar-b-que place on the riverwalk I told her of my desire to adopt.

This Korean Hanbok Will Be Our Daughter's First Birthday Outfit

I cannot wait to help our daughter celebrate her first birthday. It will be a very exciting day!

Favorites-Hopefully Will Be Home Coming Outfits!

Clothing Explanation

NO, I have not been on a wild shopping spree...These are all clothing that I have been collecting for about the past 3 1/2 years. I loved each of these outfits when I saw them and knew that they would not be available when we finally get our arms around our sweet little girl, so I bought them and have been saving them. I do have some more favorites but have not kept up on the photos of them. I might get them out and take photos so I can post them. Who knows for sure though, I will have to see how much time I can sneak away for it.

A Few More Favorites For Our Girl

Some Shirts For Our Girl

Can You Believe, Still More Clothes For Our Girl

Even More Clothes For Our Girl

More Clothes For Our Girl